&

I am now going to uncontrollably rant about proper apostrophe use. Please be patient. This is a personal vendetta of epically negligible proportions. Nobody cares about this stuff but me, I know, and I’m fighting an uphill, losing, pathetic battle. I just want to state for the record, how to use an apostrophe.

Use them to indicate possession by adding an apostrophe and an s: Bill’s teeth. For plural possessives, omit the added s if the plural form of a word already ends in s: the students’ decision. For joint possession, use an apostrophe only once: Joe and Helen’s books.

For names and proper nouns ending in s, AP style says to leave off the added s in a possessive: James’ underwear. Other stylebooks say to keep it: James’s underwear. Pick a style; either is correct.

Use them in place of omitted letters in a contraction: I’m, they’re, don’t. Also use them for omitted figures, as in years: the summer of ’69, the ’50s. (Take special note here of the direction the apostrophe curves. Note that it is not a single-quote mark.)

Use them to indicate plurals of single letters (but not multiple letters or multiple or single figures): mind your p’s and q’s, make A’s and B’s, but not recite your ABC’s (use ABCs, with no apostrophe).

NOTE: Eeew. Yeah, what is that comma doing there?