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Ten embarrassing ways in which I am disturbingly like Liz Lemon from “30 Rock.”

1. My fantasy vacation includes a turtle that brings me sandwiches.
2. If a guy apologized to me for smelling like frosting, I would marry him on the spot.
3. I occasionally take up and abandon knitting as a hobby.
4. People occasionally mistakenly assume I’m a lesbian.
5. 2-minute dance party is the greatest thing ever.
6. I buy cream soda in bulk.
7. I own, and wear, “work sneakers.”
8. I never wear flip-flops ever. It’s gross.
9. I would become addicted to a show like “MILF Island.”
10. I would buy all the hotdogs.

Three ways in which I am not:

1. I’m 27.
2. I don’t have a cool job.
3. Yeah, I can only think of two. I even fail at failing cleverly.